I thought we were done with the separation anxiety stage. I thought wrong. It's hit Harrison with vengeance.
I assumed we had passed separation anxiety in infancy to early toddler hood. Doug and I felt like he did pretty well with it. According to experts, "All children go through it (meaning separation anxiety); it's just more visible in some than in others."
Well as I continued to research the condition tends to wax and wane, usually peaking at 18 months and tapering off by 30 months. So---what this means is we are nowhere near finished, especially if we go back 3 months taking in account for the prematurity. That would mean we are 21 months, so in reality it could be another 9 months until we cleared the peak.
Harrison is struggling with daycare drop offs. To but it bluntly---they are ridiculous! The other day I wanted to pretend this wasn't my screaming kid as other parents came to drop off their children, it was that bad!
In preparation for daycare drop offs, I talk to Harrison about going to daycare in the mornings, seeing his friends and teacher and having fun. I ask him if we wants to go, and 99% of the time he will say, "Yeah." I finally got him walking into the building and going down the stairs independently by himself. Together we hang up his jacket and minute we enter his classroom, we have just lite fire to the end of the fire cracker. BOOM...let the melt down begin. It's like this everyday and since I am usually the one that drops and picks Harrison up, I am the lucky one that gets to go through this EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
This what the experts say to do: Your 2-year-old's trust in you is growing now, and this feeling of trust gives him the confidence to venture out on her own. He may still get upset when you leave her at daycare or with a sitter, but he'll recover more quickly now because he's more secure. Experience has taught him that you'll always return. Of course, knowing you'll come back and accepting your departure are two different issues. So although he's well aware that you will return, he may put on a bigger show when you leave him. Be sure to give your child the attention and reassurance he needs along with a kiss accompanied by a promise that you'll return.
I do what they so to do...because, hey---we are still first time parents... But so far---this hasn't helped at all. I am very glad today was not a daycare drop off day :) Weekends are a mini-vacation from separation anxiety.
Harrison is also having difficulty with new places with I assume goes hand in hand with all this fun separation anxiety stuff. When we go to friends homes, it takes him 45 minutes to and hour for the clingy-iness to subside and for him to venture out a bit. I think he is even getting some shyness which again is probably tied to this all.
So---Separation anxiety has not only affected daycare drop offs and social outings, it affecting sleep too. Oh FANTASTIC.
It's been about 8 days since Harrison has slept through the night. Like clock work 2 am arrives and Harrison lets out his first cry. We try to ignore it, but it doesn't work. Then Doug and I take turns getting him back into bed. Sometimes it's only once a night, or it could be like last night, when it took us 4 times. This is why I have time to write this post---he fell asleep watching Toy Story 2 (maybe he shouldn't have stayed up all night). More information from those experts say, "Your child may feel anxious if you are not there, and so is unable to relax and sleep." They are definitely right on this one.
I assumed we had passed separation anxiety in infancy to early toddler hood. Doug and I felt like he did pretty well with it. According to experts, "All children go through it (meaning separation anxiety); it's just more visible in some than in others."
Well as I continued to research the condition tends to wax and wane, usually peaking at 18 months and tapering off by 30 months. So---what this means is we are nowhere near finished, especially if we go back 3 months taking in account for the prematurity. That would mean we are 21 months, so in reality it could be another 9 months until we cleared the peak.
Harrison is struggling with daycare drop offs. To but it bluntly---they are ridiculous! The other day I wanted to pretend this wasn't my screaming kid as other parents came to drop off their children, it was that bad!
In preparation for daycare drop offs, I talk to Harrison about going to daycare in the mornings, seeing his friends and teacher and having fun. I ask him if we wants to go, and 99% of the time he will say, "Yeah." I finally got him walking into the building and going down the stairs independently by himself. Together we hang up his jacket and minute we enter his classroom, we have just lite fire to the end of the fire cracker. BOOM...let the melt down begin. It's like this everyday and since I am usually the one that drops and picks Harrison up, I am the lucky one that gets to go through this EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
This what the experts say to do: Your 2-year-old's trust in you is growing now, and this feeling of trust gives him the confidence to venture out on her own. He may still get upset when you leave her at daycare or with a sitter, but he'll recover more quickly now because he's more secure. Experience has taught him that you'll always return. Of course, knowing you'll come back and accepting your departure are two different issues. So although he's well aware that you will return, he may put on a bigger show when you leave him. Be sure to give your child the attention and reassurance he needs along with a kiss accompanied by a promise that you'll return.
I do what they so to do...because, hey---we are still first time parents... But so far---this hasn't helped at all. I am very glad today was not a daycare drop off day :) Weekends are a mini-vacation from separation anxiety.
Harrison is also having difficulty with new places with I assume goes hand in hand with all this fun separation anxiety stuff. When we go to friends homes, it takes him 45 minutes to and hour for the clingy-iness to subside and for him to venture out a bit. I think he is even getting some shyness which again is probably tied to this all.
So---Separation anxiety has not only affected daycare drop offs and social outings, it affecting sleep too. Oh FANTASTIC.
It's been about 8 days since Harrison has slept through the night. Like clock work 2 am arrives and Harrison lets out his first cry. We try to ignore it, but it doesn't work. Then Doug and I take turns getting him back into bed. Sometimes it's only once a night, or it could be like last night, when it took us 4 times. This is why I have time to write this post---he fell asleep watching Toy Story 2 (maybe he shouldn't have stayed up all night). More information from those experts say, "Your child may feel anxious if you are not there, and so is unable to relax and sleep." They are definitely right on this one.
Separation anxiety, you suck.
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