SLIDER

Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts

Behavior.

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Behavior.... UGH. I think as parents we hope that we never have to live the horror stories that our parents told us of the trauma we put them through.

Well I guess I can keep hoping...since my mom still often reminds me of my temper tantrums I had when I would undress myself in a store if I didn't get my way. I'm sure she will remind me of this soon again... I secretly think she holds on to a little PSTD from me.

Anyways---there isn't any of the undressing in public happening here. But rather I'm going to have a melt down 100 times today, for no reason at all and I am going to have those melt downs not matter what you say or do and I promise you I will be the most uncooperative, unruly child when you take me somewhere that I am expected to behave.

3 weeks ago...Harrison hit me for the first time. Just out of the blue came swinging at me with both arms. Some of you maybe thinking...first time he's hit you and he is almost 4 years old? Well yes...Trust me, I have been thankful this was his first time... However I was rather displeased when it happened again yesterday at his NICU follow up appointment. Nothing says you have control over your kids like two swinging arms coming after you...right? Talk about embarrassing, especially for a kid, who up until now has been a pretty good kid.

In the last month he has started to throw himself on the ground and whine...kick things and hit Violet Puppy for no apparent reason but just because he wants to. I guess all of this is age appropriate, but it seems like we are being bombed with this new behavior.

On top of this he screaming, shrieking all. the time. We tell him to stop and his response is, "I can't." And more recently he will scream and whine and refuses to talk to us to tell him what is bothering him. Sometimes it seems like there is someone else inside of this sweet child of ours.

I'm not blaming myself for his actions or anyone else. Doug and I feel strongly that he maybe picking up a lot of these behaviors from his preschool, but again not blaming, we are just looking for a resolution to his behavior or something to make daily life around here, less of war zone.

Doug and I attended a really awesome parenting education night our childcare center put on. The speaker was Katy Smith an family educator from the area. She did a fantastic job talking about discipline and talking about parenting as a married couple. She said a lot of great things, but one of perspectives I like that she used, was it should be like us (husband & wife) against them (children). Basically we need to tag team to tame these little monsters we have created. Another funny thing she said which I am guilty using as a threat, "and yes, who are you kidding, Santa is coming." I guess that is my cue that my everyday (Santa is watching you threats) probably aren't really working. We look forward to her next several sessions of parenting education...because yes, we really need it.

The next step for us is creating some behavioral, reward system for Harrison and backing each other up 100%. After all...it's us, against them.

I know there will be good and bad days and days we don't want to EVER remember. Really, it's all about life and how else would we ever get grey hairs?

Love you boys!


 

Love & Marriage

Tuesday, June 19, 2012


Love at first sight...you can call it cliche, call it whatever you want.


Doug and I met June 17, 2002 and we instantly fell in love. If anyone would have told me when I was a kid that I would meet and fall in love with my husband at 18 years old, I wouldn't have believed them.

Three months into our relationship I remember saying to myself, "I am going to marry this guy some day." 14 months into our relationship Doug nervously got down on one knee and proposed to me. The excitement and happiness for the next step in to our future in one word would be "powerful." We couldn't wait to share the news with our family and friends.

We received so much love and support as our lives were shifting to move forward. However to this day I remember the response a person gave to us when we announced our engagement. Instead of a blessing or sharing happiness this was said, "I hope you wait a while." How to respond to that? It's been nearly 9 years since then and to this day I honestly don't know if there is any right way to respond to that.

One thing I am very certain is that we have love that only grows stronger with each year. Marriage isn't an easy thing and if anyone tells you it is they aren't living in reality. In the last 10 years of our relationship and 7 years of marriage we have been through a lot of ups and downs. Some things in life make it hard to think you will get past something and that there are brighter days a head. Sometimes life events cause stress on a marriage, been there done that. Our marriage was tested with our son's two month battle in the NICU that was anything but rainbows and sunshine. Instead of growing apart, it brought us together. We hold tight, hoping and praying for a safe arrival our second son in November.

It takes two people to make a relationship work, even sometimes it takes two people fighting with all their might to hold the pieces together. Every marriage is different and I can't speak for any other, I am speaking from our own marriage our own relationship.

You know what I love about our marriage and relationship? Everything. The good, bad, ugly, and the sunshine that follows. That's life, unpredictable...filled with happiness, sorrow, love, forgiveness, excitement. That unpredictability fuels our marriage and keeps us wondering where life will take us and our family.

Monday evening we celebrated our 7 year marriage with simplicity. We ate dinner at the first restaurant Doug ever took me too in our little town. We then walked some trails in one of the most beautiful areas in town.

With a tripod and timer, we managed to capture of few "date night" anniversary photo keepers. 





Doug captured this image of Baby Bee and I, the best anniversary gift ever.


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